For so many women, especially in midlife, the relationship with their body feels complicated.
It’s been shaped by decades of subtle messaging: be smaller, be quieter, be in control. Be pleasing. Be perfect.
You may have learned to override your body’s needs in order to fit in, stay safe, or feel worthy. And now? That internalised pressure shows up as mistrust, comparison, criticism, or even a quiet numbness.
It shows up in ways that feel so familiar you hardly notice:
Skipping meals or eating while distracted, because you don’t believe your hunger deserves your full attention
Pushing through fitness routines you don’t even enjoy, just because you think you should, chasing a version of yourself from 10 years ago
Criticising your body in the mirror, even when no one’s around
Feeling disconnected from pleasure, rest, or genuine ease in your body, like your body is just a vehicle to manage or discipline
Comparing yourself to younger women or your past self, and feeling quietly ashamed of how your body has changed
Feeling numb, resentful, or checked out, especially during moments when your body needs care the most
But what if your body wasn’t the problem?
What if she’s been patiently waiting, beneath all the rules and roles, for you to listen, reconnect, and begin again?
This isn’t about fixing your body.
This is about healing the relationship you have with her.
Below are three powerful, compassionate ways to start rebuilding trust - from the inside out.
1. Use EFT to Change the Beliefs That Keep You at War with Your Body
Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping) helps release the emotional residue of past experiences, like shame, rejection, control, or being told your body was “too much” or “not enough.” These moments leave subconscious imprints that silently dictate how safe or unsafe it feels to be in your body.
EFT offers a gentle, effective way to:
Unhook from toxic beliefs like “I can’t trust my hunger,” “I need to earn rest,” or “My body must be fixed.”
Process trauma, criticism, or moments of disconnection stored in the body
Tap into self-acceptance, not as a concept, but a felt embodied reality
Tapping gently rewires the nervous system so that kindness becomes your default, not punishment.
Even a few minutes a day can begin to shift deeply rooted patterns and open space for a new story.
Try this prompt: “Even though I’ve spent years at war with my body, I’m open to building a relationship based on care, not control, love not fear.”
2. Meditate to Calm Your Mind and Reclaim Choice
Let’s be honest, most of us weren’t taught to befriend our minds. To hold boundaries with it the way we would any other person in our entourage that may be influencing our well-being and capacity to thrive.
Instead, we learned to react to every thought as if it were fact, especially the critical ones:
"You’re falling behind."
"Everyone else is doing it better."
"Your body is wrong."
Meditation gives you the power to pause and remember: You are not your thoughts. You can choose your thoughts - like you choose your clothes and they can be kind not critical.
You don’t need to sit cross-legged on a cushion for an hour.
You can begin with 5 minutes of sitting quietly, breathing slowly, and noticing your body’s sensations with curiosity.
With Mind Calm meditation for example, it’s not about stopping your thoughts, but about changing your relationship with them.
You simply sit with your eyes closed for a few minutes, rest your attention on the present moment, and gently return to awareness whenever the mind wanders. No effort. No pressure. Just stillness and presence.
This simple practice:
Creates space between your thoughts and your reactions, between who you are and what you think
Calms your nervous system and restores emotional regulation as well as quieting inner noise
Cultivates compassion from the inside out
Access a sense of calm that isn’t dependent on external circumstances
Meditation isn’t about “doing it right.” It’s about coming home to yourself. It’s about being present, again and again, and remembering: You are not your thoughts. You are the awareness behind them.
3. Reclaim Joyful Movement (Not Should-Based or even Shame-based Fitness)
If you’ve ever felt guilty for not doing enough or punished yourself with movement that felt like a chore… you’re not alone.
But your body isn’t here to be micromanaged.
She’s here to be inhabited.
Reclaiming movement as joy, not obligation, can transform the way you experience yourself, not to mention give you access to unimaginable wisdom and healing.
That might look like:
Dancing barefoot in your kitchen to your favourite tune from the 80s
Taking a slow walk without tracking steps or burning calories
Stretching while listening to music that moves your heart
Reconnecting to yoga or pilates in a way that feels nourishing and connected, not performative
The key is to drop the shoulds and tune into what feels freeing, energising, or soul-soothing.
Movement becomes less about changing your body and more about being in your body.
What Happens When You Start Listening?
When you stop overriding and start listening, with compassion and curiosity, you begin to rebuild trust.
Your body stops bracing and tension subsides. Your inner critic quiets. And you start to feel safe inside your own skin again.
Healing your relationship with your body isn’t a linear process, and it doesn’t happen overnight. But with the right tools, guidance, and support, you can move from tension to tenderness, one small act of kindness and deep listening at a time.
Ready to go deeper?
Join me for a 1:1 session or book a connection call (https://catherineodeahughes.as.me/schedule.php) to experience the shift firsthand.
This isn’t about fixing your body, it’s about finally letting her feel safe, seen, and supported.
You deserve that.
She deserves that.
Kindness and courage
Catherine
